"Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives but none about his or her own." - Paulo Cuelho, The Alchemist
I don't think I need to add anything to this quote. It is pretty self explanatory. Oftentimes we are so quick to give advice and tell others how they should live their lives even when we don't know their whole story. Oftentimes we have this savior complex and we feel we can make other people's lives better even though our own lives are a mess.
The worst part about savior complex is that it hurts both sides. For the person listening, he or she may be introduced to ideas that they never would have thought of on their own. This may lead to a lot of negative thoughts. Before they were happy in the state they were in, now they have been told you're not living your life the way you should, you should do this and that. My teachers have said if you sincerely want change for someone, then pray for them. Stop trying to motivate them and pushing them. Until the spark comes from within, the person will not change.
Then the person giving the advice is also hurt because then he or she has expectations that this person will listen to my advice and become awesome. When they inevitably don't reach their expectations, they are hurt.
The only person you can control is you. Stop focusing on others, focus on yourself. Life has a weird system. The more you focus on yourself, you'll find those around you also being uplifted and inspired by you. The more you focus on others, the more you will waste your own time. Your words will have little value in others eyes. You won't be inspirational, you'll be annoying.
That's one thing these motivational speakers have in common. The good speakers at the end of the day have no expectations from you. They want the best for you, but if you don't change, their life remains unaffected. They sincerely care for you and want to bring you up, but they are so focused on themselves and getting better themselves that they don't have time to make sure everyone else is living up to their full potential.
That is what give people that internal spark. You don't get the internal spark from being yelled at by your mom. It happens when you see your friend working hard and doing well. The internal spark happens when you see something and you want it for yourself. Someone that is not living at 100% will never be successful in telling others to live at 100%. The words will have no weight because they are not practicing what they preach.
You only have one life, stop focusing on the lives of others and focus on yourself. If you want to inspire others, you have to lead an inspiring life.